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Thaha!
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Posted on 09-11-08 1:23
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Hi all,
Two years ago, I came to Canada in student visa for my PhD. After few months in Canada, I sponsored my wife for her stay here and she got dependent visa under visitor category from India for nearly 4 years (her visitor visa expires in December 2010 when my study permit expires). After she joined me nearly for 1 year, she went back Nepal, stayed there about 6 months and then later had divorce from me about 2 months ago. Now, our 5 years old son lives with my parents in Nepal, whom we did not bring to Canada when my wife joined me those time.
My ex-wife recently told me (she is still in my touch as she frequently visits our home to see our son) that she does not have a good life in Nepal, so she wants to come to Canada to work or study here using the same visitor visa (she still has a valid visitor visa which I sponsored) telling the Canadian authority that she is still my wife if enquired at the port of entry. But, those time, I was the sponsor for her cost and took responsibility for everything during her stay here when she applied for dependent visa. Now, I am no longer her sponsor if she makes any visit to Canada. Next, it is legally and morally unacceptable if she uses the same visitor visa to come to Canada as my wife.
I told my ex-wife not to misuse that visa in coming to Canada and I also want to stop her from doing so if possible. How can I do this? Do I need to inform Canadian authority that I am already divorced from her and am no longer responsible for her any trip to Canada? Can I request them to revoke her visitor visa she obtained as a dependent of mine at those time? I am planning to visit Nepal sometime soon, get married and bring my new wife and son to Canada. If my ex-wife comes to Canada on that visa, will my new wife have any problem in obtaining visa?
Thanks for your suggestions in advance!
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tintotopi
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Posted on 09-11-08 1:40
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If you are planning to marry in Nepal then just do not response to her request because you dont want to ruin your status in Canada. Tell her the truth that you are planning to remarry. She will do what ever she needs to do later on but dont get involved in illegal activities.. she is your ex wife..
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MillionDollars
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Posted on 09-11-08 3:00
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I think not notifying the authorities can jeorpadize your new wife's visa approval. They cannot technically have visas issued for two women as your wives.. Do the right thing as it will enhance your position when applying for new visa for your prospective wife.. Good luck.
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Thaha!
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Posted on 09-12-08 9:18
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Thanks to tintotopi and milliondollars for million dollars suggestions. I will try to inform the Canadian authority about my divorce. But, how? Where should I go? What should I tell them or what documents should I submit to them?
Thanks again.
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MillionDollars
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Posted on 09-12-08 10:27
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I think you should send your docs to where the visitor original visa was isued. You should send a copy of the visitor visa, your own PR document, previous marrigage certificate, divorce certificate. Just think what you would need to process this request if you were the visa officer. Make sure you state your intention to re-marry and apply for the visas soon. Also retain copies of your request which you can keep as an evidence of your good-will.
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tintotopi
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Posted on 09-12-08 10:38
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Go to Canadian Immigration site. I am sure there is something for student dependent visa.. If not.. then i dont think u need to do anything until the authority calls you for the verification. Legally she is no one to you... as a relative so even if she commits any crime, you cannot be held responsible.
BUT
When Authority calls you then tell them the truth.
When you marry in nepal and applying for your new wife's visa.. tell them that the ex wife visa needs to be revoked .
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Thaha!
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Posted on 09-13-08 8:30
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Thank you both Million dollars and tintotopi again for your advices. I will contact to local immigration office in Canada and see what they suggest.
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Haribansa
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Posted on 10-03-08 4:54
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Why don't you try to work things out with her rather than gettiing a new wife. Your son willnot get the same treatment from a new mom as he would from her. I hate to see family getting scattered. As long as things work you shoudl try to sort it out. Life is too short for regrets in future...What if your new wife si not what you want........and u realise it late? There are 4 lifes that will get messed up. Yours.......new wife's, old wife's and your son's. I really feel for your son...I really wonder what kind of thinking will he develop when he grows up?? If your old wife wants to come back to canada she may be tryign to get back with you..........see if it works and if it doesnot then you can think otherwise. I think it will be better for your son...just a suggestion!
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here4life
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Posted on 10-03-08 5:54
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I agree with Harbansa. try to work it out man. I have seen too many dysfunctional family because of divorce. But u know your case so you may think it is easier for me to say that. You have to think about your son and his life. Don't be selfish. try to work it out before getting a divorce. let your wife come to canada, give her a chance and make it work with her first.
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here4life
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Posted on 10-03-08 5:54
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I agree with Harbansa. try to work it out man. I have seen too many dysfunctional family because of divorce. But u know your case so you may think it is easier for me to say that. You have to think about your son and his life. Don't be selfish. try to work it out before getting a divorce. let your wife come to canada, give her a chance and make it work with her first.
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jenny
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Posted on 10-03-08 8:59
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As soon as your new wife has kids of her own then she'll start treating your son bad and if he does anything even a tiniest thing to her kid then your older son from previous marriage will get it. Why do you think there is bad things said about step moms? there can't be a fire without a spark. Don't be in haste to re-marry, please think of your son's future not just your selfish needs. I have seen first hand, no matter how good a step mom is she's still a step mom and there will be discrimination. Unless you marry someone who can't have kids of her own but where will u find that kind of girl? And even though you are not together with your wife anymore, she is still your son's birth mother, noone will love him more then his own mother and a child needs both mother and father growing up. So I think you should let her come to Canada first and let her change her status so your son can have love of his own mother growing up, then you can re-marry after that if you choose to. Too bad the relationship between you and your wife did not work, but don't make the poor innocent kid pay the price for it.
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Bears23
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Posted on 10-03-08 10:25
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WOMEN......."IF THERE WAS NO SEXUAL DESIRE I WUD LEAST CARE ABT THEM.."
BEARS23
Last edited: 03-Oct-08 10:29 PM
Last edited: 03-Oct-08 10:30 PM
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Thaha!
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Posted on 10-04-08 9:02
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Thanks guys for the valuable suggestions and concerns. I understand your feelings.
She was the one who ran away from the relationship with some purpose and opted for the divorce herself. Actually, she was already in some sorts of on and off relationship with some guy before getting married with me and I heard from some very relaible sources that she had been enjoying the company of some guy right after seperation with me. Perhaps that was the reason why she tried to fight with me and opted out. For your knowledge, I myself tried hard convincing her not to go for divorce at those times for our son's sake despite knowing that she was not faithful wife.
That time during divorce process she did not even want her son (actually my son) with her, and did not request the court either. But, sometime later when she might have realized that she did a blunder perhaps because her relationship with her beau got worse or terminated (I have solid proofs that she had some guys at some different times before marriage with me and she herself even told me about it), she is trying to improve her relationship especially with my family and my son and woo them. So, recently from last 4-5 months she started frequently visiting my family to see our son (she used to ignore or neglet him during divorce process and even did not want to see him about 5-6 months that time) Recently, she even told me that she is having a living hell over there and would like to come to Canada.
Forget about her, she is not an honest person. She will futher cheat me and ruin my life if I allow her to come to Canada and join me for the sake of my son. But, I already informed Canadian authority about my divorce and requested them to stop her from entering Canada if she produce my study permit claiming that she is still my wife and she was just vising her husband.
My son is happy with my family and they love him more than anyone or anything else. He calls me almost everyday for about 2-3 minutes from home on the days I do not call home. My ex can visit our son whenever she likes and she should be satisfied with the visitation rights. And you know step mom is nice when you are nice. Step mom do not behave well when her own kids do not get enough to eat or to wear or to have good study, etc. But, we will have enough here in Canad so there will be no bone of contention between kids or between husband and wife or between son and step mom. So, I am sure my son will get enough care and love from his step mom-to-be.
Thanks again, I sense you guys. I knew reconciliation was the best way to go at those times despite knowing the fact that she was not an honest woman, but still unfortunately that did not work.
Last edited: 04-Oct-08 09:15 AM
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Haribansa
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Posted on 10-10-08 3:30
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Thaha,
People do mistakes in life and who am I to tell you to do this and that...........but I have seen 100's of situations where wife forgave husband for what they did in past. And things went smoother in long run.You both are getting older day by day...what you would have thought was 100% right 4 years back, could be what a stupid idea I was thinking.........now!. I am seen too many of relationship like that...but mostly forgiven by women.
Your wife may have realised her mistakes, she could have improved. Even if you did inform canadian immigration regarding her issues...........I would still advise you to have a good talk with her when you go to Nepal. See what she has to say. Don't take too much negative feelings for her. Looks at her situation and see where she stands right now.
Your scenario may be different, but often nepali guys have a tendency of thinking new wife and new life...but it doesnot happen like that. Your son will be a step son for your new wife no matter what you say. And because you have gone thru divorce before you will keep on agreeing on things that your new wife has to say............trust me you will have insecurity feeling at this time too! Your new wife will have advantage towards you being a devorced man.
Talk to her and see if it is right step. Don't remarry until you are absolutely SURE!
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u_day
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Posted on 11-11-08 1:55
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Dude, his sife went back to nepal and cheated on him. Why should he try to get back with her?
Report canadian authority about possible visa fraud and attach your divorce paper with your application.
hahahaha, this thread is classic.
The story goes like this:
The Guy is in college Getting his PhD, Wife gets bored and suggests the hubby that she should go back to Nepal so that he can focus on his studies... she goes back, cheats on him and divorces him so that she can have fun with her new boytoy.
4-5 months later, she gets reality check. Now wants to come back to Canada as she has no money left. Calls her ex-hubby asking him if she can come back to Canada.
Now tell me, what you would do if you were the guy?
Last edited: 11-Nov-08 02:01 PM
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u_day
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Posted on 11-11-08 2:06
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Thaha,
I knew the story even before reading your last posting. As I guessed she ran out of money. That is why she wants to come back to canada. If you eant to avenge her for what she did to you and your son, let her come to Canada under your sponsored visa. Meanwhile, report canadian authorities about your divorce. Shen she gets here, she will be returned from the airport. even if she gets here, she will be deported.
Last edited: 11-Nov-08 02:06 PM
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Thaha!
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Posted on 11-11-08 5:21
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Haribansa, some mistakes that are made deliberately or intentionally can not be pardoned. And, she cheated me and my family not only in the relationship but by financially as well, very heavily. If I pardon and allowe her to come in my and my son's lives, she will futher mesh up our lives instead of bringing in happiness in our lives as I know her nature and attitude. I can't belive some woman can be so mean and do everything for her pleasure. So, we are better off without her and I don't want to be cheated further by her.
Yes U_day, I had invested or spent for her over 20-25 lakhs during marriage, later on and after separation. She dies for money and the reason she wants to come back is not because she developed some love and felt some responsibility for my son, but because she wants to use me to make some money and that's my understanding.
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vname
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Posted on 11-11-08 8:53
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Report to Immigration about your status change.There must be some sort of form/s to let them know of change of circumstances . You cannot sponser two wives (in case you get remarry).
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u_day
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Posted on 12-26-08 10:44
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in that case, tell her that you will help her come to Canada but cand afford her travel expenses. Have her buy tickets and get in the flight meanwhile inform the immigration of her status and give them her flight detail and where and when she will be landing in Canada. They will make her return in the same flight
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