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SITARA
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Posted on 08-08-07 4:53
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Girls’ Night Out! "Forkin' Ice-O!" muttered Mareea, my Bolivian friend at the disappearing back of a guy who had just joined our table. Mareea (Bolivian), Katerina (Swedish), Karen (Carribean) and I had finally decided to go out for dinner and drinks one Saturday. It had been a while since we had met and after a sound warning from each of them, I agreed to give up my blue jeans-white Tshirt-Gap-look and wear a little black dress. So, off I went clippity clopping in high heels to meet my girl friends, all dressed in black like the witches of Harry Potter. After a good Thai dinner of "coconut milk in everytiiing" as my Carribean friend said, we had trudged on to the nearest bar for a drink. Barely seated, a guy had lurched toward our table and with a crooked, goofy smile said hello. "Are you O gay?!!!" said a concerned Mareea in a heavy Spanish accent. The guy blinked at her and we blinked at both. "Exscooose me, are you O gay?!" repeated Mareea, looking around. We understood and burst into a peal of laughter, while the poor guy, offended, flustered and humiliated went into a stream of obscenities at poor Mareea and left. Then, it hit her, she meant to say, "Are You Okay?!" He had heard what we had heard. "Whaaa, Chitara, you haav a problen wi mai aaccen?!" she shot at me. "Not I, he did!" I laughed. After an uneventful rest of the evening, we decided to go to my apt for a glass of wine. "Okay, let's talk about irrational fears!" said a tipsy Katerina. For some odd reason she had adopted a soft Southern drawl after landing in the US 8 years ago although I still teased her about her SVedish accent with a "My naime is Iinnnga! Yaah??!' Mareea said, "Ho K you go go firrs" to Karen. Karen took a big gulp of her wine and confessed "I'll never marry a black man or a Carribean man; Nona dose for me!" Shocked, we stared at Karen's beautiful face; her features perfect, like an artistic hand had swept over her chocolate mocha colored skin. "No! I'll marry a white man or go Gay!!! My first Carribean love left me for a Fat, Fat, Fat white woman... dey have an insatiable desire for white skin!" Ok, I said, let's drink to that! Katerina's turn, "You'll laugh. But my biggest fear is that on my wedding night, my old couch will start talking! I tell you, it will jinx my wedding. I'm going to give it to Good Will before I get married!' We burst out laughing. I almost choked on my wine. "Hokey, Chitara, yur tun." "Well, it's silly... I never buy Lottery tickets... I’m afraid I'LL WIN!" I said. "WHAT????!!!!" said all three. Sheepishly, I explained "Yah, Well, I wouldn't know what to do with all that money... I'll be so worried, I'll lose sleep over it... My life will change. It's not worth it for me! So, to save myself all that trouble, I don't buy lottery tickets at all/haven't at all!". "Heee, haaaaw, haaw, ha ha ha!" went all my friends. I didn't know if it was the wine or the company. "Ok, Ok, Mareea's turn" I diverted the attention. Mareea looked hard at me, took a sip and said, " I HATE your Cultoor, Chitara!!" "What?!" I said in disbelief. "Ya, I fell in lowv wi an India guy. He promis, we marrie for two yerrs an den, he wen to India and got arrain(ged) marry! Forkin baastar! and I stil caaan('t) get overr him." We fell silent, we all remembered that she had the hardest time picking up the pieces. I poured her some wine and lightly asked, "and your irrational fear?" Mareea's face brightened, "I am afrai, I'll fall in lowve wi aaanotherr India Guy! I pray an I pray!" We all smiled. Mareea was a good sport, with a good heart and a captivating smile and naughty, naughty wicked eyes. That night we just lolled around, happy with easy camaraderie but each one of locked in our own private reverie. My irrational fear, I mused but could not blurt out was " I have a fear of marriage!" After having tiptoed and tap danced around it for so long, I still remember my last proposal... the one (and only) I made on an impulse to a dear friend "Marry me! AFTER TWO years!" I gagged, and then he gagged! Then we both had started laughing uncontrollably. Then, I tried to explain... I don't know what... that I was not ready right THEN, or that he was still Immature THEN... that he would grow up after two years or that I would. Then, it became a private joke between us. Honestly, But I Still don't know why I blurted out such an absurdity. ~*~ Five years later, Mareea is missing in action, somewhere in Canada; Katerina has two babies and living in the far far East, the offending couch, broken after much wear and tear, was was last seen in a dump truck; Karen is in Boston pursuing her Phd, divorced x 2 and I, got married, after warning him I have a marriage phobia. He proposed. I took a deep breath and dived headlong into it. Marriages don't come with life jackets and instruction manuals. It's a scary thought. My mom used to say, one can predict a birth but none can predict death or marriage "tyasmathi, aajkaal ka KT harroo dherai sochera, bicharera, Jotish lai pani gari khanoo didainan iniharoo ley!"
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The postings in this thread span 2 pages, go to PAGE 1.
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killerspin
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Posted on 08-08-07 8:25
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Pretty well writtein Sitara didi. Hope u are happy with your marriage ? Quick question though - marriage gets complicated after a while: who is to be blamed ? Husband, wife, circumstances or the very nature of relationship ?
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Khusi.
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Posted on 08-08-07 8:39
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Sitara Di, I really enjoyed it. Those moments ..with friends..It feels good to be around them..get a little tipsy and talk and talk...
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Atlian
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Posted on 08-08-07 9:32
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Very beautifully crafted. Just made me drift back in memory lane in those inexplicably sweet old time.
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SITARA
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Posted on 08-09-07 12:54
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Shirishji, thank you, it gives me real pleasure to know your read my anecdotes, still. And the super fast reader that you are! ;) Bhauteji, I remember those Thailand days and having to improvise ways to venture around town. Thank you again for reading. Kalopaniji, you did not read the end obviously. As to the origination of your interesting question, they say, "if you ain't getting IT, it's always on your mind," hoina hajur? ;) Thank you for comment. Camoflaged, "Welcome to the Club ho ki, the Band Wagon ho ki, the Circurs ho" :) I think it goes through all those phases in due time. ThapaP, you always make me smile hajur. I am one of those hopelessly impulsive, moody writers--lekhna man lagyo ya gunaso garna man lagyo bhaney, it is therapeutic kya. Nails, "Sounds Again" is certainly the one after my heart because the premise on a child's hopelessness. But I take your comments for this one too, any day. Manvi, you can call me dijju, Sitara or "You Can Call Me Al" It's great to know you sometimes read my writing. Aaja badta naak phoolcha kya. Killerspin, thank you for asking--Yes, I am very happy with my marriage. With so much going on around me, I just feel like a Rookie Juggler who's still learning the act. As for blame in marriage, to paraphrase what Khalil Gibran said, " How can you blame/punish one whose remorse is greater than his misdeeds?" Khusi, those bygone days are the ones that allow us to make the choices we make in life; at least, we can laugh at it in the company of friends. Lovely to see you here. Atlian, thank you for your kind words. It's my day that I see new names here.
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SITARA
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Posted on 08-09-07 12:58
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ThapaP, you asked, "hajur ko accent chhai khoi ni !!! he he he (O: " What accent? I like most Nepali people, am deaf to my own accent! So there!
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SITARA
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Posted on 08-09-07 1:13
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Oh, and blind to my own typos too!
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chipledhunga
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Posted on 08-09-07 2:20
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Chitaraji, great writing as always.
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world_map
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Posted on 08-09-07 2:36
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Sitara ji, Entertaining piece! I think I read about your Bolivian friend Mareea in another piece a few years back. She has a cute accent. Happy Married life!
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lootekukur
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Posted on 08-09-07 2:39
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sitaraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii, are you O-GAY?<img src=/sajha/chat/smileys/m-biggrin.gif> i like it when women/girls get tipsy ....tipsy conversations are always fun, no? . btw, i can PAY to see girls getting "wild" hahahaha.... as always, good penWOmanship! whatever you write, it comes out so natural. BRAVO! never ceases to spellbind yours truly!
Last edited: 09-Aug-07 02:40 PM
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phoenix
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Posted on 08-09-07 3:08
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Sitara dee, Your writings never cease to tingle our tastebuds ! Somehow made me walk down memory lane and the reality of "Marriages don't come with life jackets and instruction manuals" caught me grinning to myself. In other words, i simply enjoyed it, savoured every bit of the conversation and missed all my frens who are missing in action. Looking forward to reading more from you. Cheers phoenix
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SurNaTal
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Posted on 08-09-07 9:54
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Beautiful! I was missing all these so far, late is better than never, I started enjoying your beautiful writtings Sitara Di.
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Utopia12
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Posted on 08-09-07 10:03
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A JOKE first year of marriage, the husband hollers & wife listens, 2nd............................wife hollers n husband listens, 3rd ........................... both of them holler and neighbors listen.
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thapap
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Posted on 08-09-07 10:34
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utopia, @ least you do not have an utopian view (O: he he he
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sajhakhohero
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Posted on 08-09-07 10:43
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I LOVE ALL MY DAHLINGS WHEN THEY ARE DRUNK.....................HAHAHA THEN I CAN PLAY PLAY WITH THEM.
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Utopia12
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Posted on 08-09-07 10:43
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thapap, do u think so? My bottom line is to be happy, make people happy, n never hurt anybody! I wish I'll never vacillate from that. I dont think the joke above impugns anybody, even citara. lets wait, wat she thinks (fingers crossed) !
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thapap
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Posted on 08-09-07 10:56
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utopia, actually... chitara dijju.. that joke impugns you right...... he he he my chitara dijju is gr8... i think chitara dijju is too dynamic and smart.. name nai chitara ho... ke bayan garnu... she moves in lightening speed hence please use this conversion matrix.... utopian timeline of 1 year = chitarian timeline of 1 day he he he (O: ===================================================== before i get beaten with sandles, i would be tapping away, uttering, what do i know (O:
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John_Galt
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Posted on 08-10-07 9:03
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Sitara, When I choose to reply to you, I always run out of words. Magnificently written! Hope these two words sum it all up. But then, it made me recollect a similar anecdote you had written few years ago. Is Mareea the same friend you had back then? Once again you have successfully portrayed her thick accent and the gung-ho yet confused self. Marriage certainly fails to deliver the mode of survival, but over the years of hits and misses you have to create it on your own. I have written a standard operating procedure, my wife further adorned it with stern work instructions, and when they both fail to work at times, I craft CAPAs (Corrective and Preventive actions).
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SunnyDev
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Posted on 08-11-07 9:07
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Once bitten, twice shy. Two of your girlfriends have reasonable fear. You blamed your fear for possible lack of maturity. I too have the same fear but I blame my ambition which will suffer ( at least the way I see it) from any kind of emotional commitment. I have enough. I am not ready to add more. By the way talking couch was so interesting. How could you come up with such imagination? If couch would reveal all the "brunt" it bore, I guess the world will be a better place to live. No pretensions, no lies. Wait.... It may be the other way. No faith, no love.
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SOULFREE
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Posted on 08-11-07 10:40
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Sitz jyu, If I am not mistaken, I read it years ago. And it's so good that it's worth a reread. Mareea is such a character. :)
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Brain Malfunction
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Posted on 08-11-07 5:15
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Well crafted words! Beautiful narration!! Keep it up.. -BM
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